My throat grew tight. I felt like I couldn’t swallow. Everything seemed to be going black around me. Why can’t I see? What is happening? I could feel my heart begin to race, running faster than my legs were moving. But I was not moving. In fact, I found myself stuck. Frozen. In one place. There is no way I could keep going. How am I going to make it? What if...what if I can’t? Or, what if...what if I FAIL!? It just seems easier to stay where I am at. I fear failure. But wait, what about that girl? How did she get to where she is? She must have been so great she didn’t fail. There is no way she failed. Nah, I will stay here and wait. Sure, I am not moving, but…
Does this sound familiar? Have you been in this position before or are you in it currently? This was me, is me, in almost every endeavor I think about attempting. Before going to college for my teaching degree, receiving my masters degree, having children, getting married, writing a blog, giving Tarot readings, opening up to others about my gift...In each of these moments, I felt that same fear. Fear of failure. Nobody would know it because I seem so ‘with-it.’ Lucky for me, my thoughts are internal, and lucky for you, you don’t realize how hard I am trying. Nonetheless, I do have fear, failure is depressing. A low feeling. Overcoming it makes it that much harder. And you CAN overcome it.
Imagine yourself past the fear
Where are you if you don’t fail? Envision your goal and imagine you are holding the trophy at the end of the finish line. The process is important, but in order to get started you need to know how you want it to end.
Identify your possible roadblocks
Not every endeavor is the same, nor the person completing it. That being said, there will be stops on the way-each one unique to your situation. Recognize where those stops may be and come up with a plan on how you are going to overcome them. When we plan for possible challenges, they seem to be less surprising when they occur and we feel more prepared.
Keep your expectations high, but your pace slow.
This is sooooo important here guys. A big reason I have seen people fail and give up is because they hit the ground running so hard that they don’t keep pace with the track. Everything takes time. I challenge you to expect and allow that time to help your goal cultivate. It is okay.
Use that growth mindset
The glass is half full here peeps. Every day brings challenges, it also brings successes. Don’t get caught up in the successes, and learn from the challenges. You will trip, you may fall, heck, you may bump your head pretty badly. Duly noted, thank you, and get back up again. I know it seems simple, and it doesn’t feel that way, but it could be. You got this.
Believe in yourself
When I ask you what it feels like to believe in something, what would you say? Perhaps you trust that you are protected? Safe? Guided? Now, apply that thinking when I challenge you to believe in yourself. Trust yourself that you can do it. Guide yourself in such a way that you can achieve your goal. Protect yourself from feeling fear of failure. You need yourself first in order to move forward out of that spot.
Failure is real. It holds us back. It keeps us from moving forward. It seems to just get in the way. Failure, itself, is worse than falling, because it brings us to recognize our own efforts as meaningless. Who wants to see that? While this is true, yes I have experienced it myself, I also must realize that failure is an action but the action is nothing unless it is tied to an emotion. That emotion is fear. Overcome your fear, overcome your worries of failure. Then, failure becomes part of the process but not the end-game.
What are some things you have done to overcome your fears? Share your kernels with us. Thank you