Karmic Relationship

That moment when your eyes meet. You lock gazes. You can feel in your spirit that there is something between you; a spark, a connection, an attraction. Your heart palpitates at the sound of his voice. When he says your name it is almost as if everything around you stops.

He calls you HIS. Your relationship blossoms, moving quickly like a red hot flame. Little did you know that the same special moment, that same flame that brings you thrill and excitement, can transform to something worse than anything you would have imagined. All of a sudden, almost dramatically, it seems as though you are trapped in a vortex, and, in the center, a burning fire working to devour your inner well-being, your confidence, and your sanity. Your life seems to turn upside down. In some ways you feel like you are lost. You feel like you are alone. You blame yourself. You wonder how did I get myself into this and, most importantly, how do I get myself out? How do I walk away from somebody that I thought was perfect in so many ways? How do I let go of all of the good memories that we do have and accept the truth...the reality...the inevitability that my once mesmerizing relationship was actually the beginning of a lesson that I had to learn?
If this is you, rest assured that you are not alone. This is an experience that many have seen and some more lucky to naught. In fact, this was me almost 5 years ago. I found myself in a situation where I was engulfed in a man’s love to then be raptured and misled. And yes, I meant to use the word ‘raptured.’ What I thought was love was actually what I now know as a karmic relationship. Karmic, like Karma, except that it wasn’t as if I put myself in the position to be abused or mistreated-it just so happened that I was led astray by my own life path, my own past choices, to bring me to an awakening. You see, karmic relationships are not supposed to last. They are not meant for two people to remain in for a long period of time. This is because they are toxic. They, like my own relationship, are just as menacing and just as hateful, as they are deep and passionate. It was life changing. It was eye opening and heart wrenching. I had to fall hard in order to truly understand the works that were in order. I had to make a drastic shift in my own life because that is exactly what a karmic relationship is supposed to elicit-change. 
Breaking away from the relationship was like breaking an addiction. It was one of the most difficult experiences in my life, and here I am. One day I woke up and was ready to be free. If you are like me, or are in a situation similar to mine and you are reading this, then you are thinking the same thing I was at the time. That I needed a way out. Sometimes the only way out is to take a look from within. That was part of my escape. I know it sounds melodramatic in some ways, but it is the truth. I faced my hard truth. I accepted my lesson. In fact, I can say that years later I am grateful for the learning that I made. I had to turn to family and friends, I had to challenge myself to be more independent and self-secure, I had to place a lens over my life and where I wanted to be, and I had to take responsibility for my choices, words, and actions. It was my karmic relationship, and one that I hope to never have to relive in this life or another! My next step in my evolution was separating myself from the karmic bond that I had developed with him. I had to sever ties. That, my dear friends, is also known as cutting cords-another experience that I am sure many of you are not too far from, or one that is just around the corner. If it is time to cut your karmic ties and you are seeking, as I was, to learn more about them, you can read my next post. You are one step closer to your next best self, since there is no real way to go back to who you were before. Who would want that anyway? There were good memories, right?